Those who cannot find joy in life, do not feel the happiness that exists around them always find ways to bind themselves with stubborn actions and thoughts.
Try to control everything
Everyone wants to be able to take control of their lives and make precise plans for the future. But the truth is that no matter how hard we try, there will always be something we cannot change, control, or predict.
But chronically unhappy people don’t understand this. They can’t learn to accept and relax waiting for something to go wrong but always try to stick rigidly to a certain plan, only to suffer when it doesn’t go their way. want.
Another habit of unhappy people is self-blame and low self-esteem. Not feeling satisfied, being too strict with yourself and focusing so much on your flaws and shortcomings that you overlook the things you’ve already done.
An example is the mental illness that psychologists call “negative self-talk”. This means they constantly think of themselves as being too harsh and self-critical like “I’m stupid” or “I messed everything up”…. This is really self-degrading. self-esteem, causing feelings of depression and anxiety.
People who are constantly unhappy are easily discouraged, fear failure, and always choose the path of least stumbling. If faced with difficulties, they would rather give up and run away than face uncertainty.
Typical of this type of person is wanting to be in a comfortable, safe place and being afraid of trying new things and taking risks. They don’t follow their passion because they think it’s too difficult. A boring life is what they accept.
Have a victim mindset
When researching and treating patients with depression, the founder of positive psychology, Dr. Martin Seligman, noticed that many of them suffer from a syndrome called “learning impotence”.
Feelings of helplessness lead to self-destructive behavior, always feeling difficult and unable to do anything about it. They can only wait for others to save them because they think they can’t act and save themselves from trouble. In short, they always see themselves as “victims” and of course, they can’t feel anything called happiness.
Although it is undeniably financial, it will certainly bring us a lot of freedom and peace of mind. But in the end, money can’t buy real and lasting happiness.
In fact, studies show the opposite: constantly chasing money and putting too much emphasis on material things often makes us happier, reduces life satisfaction, reduces happiness. , leading to fatigue. Because when we always want more, it’s easy to get upset when we see someone having more than us.
Chronically unhappy people tend to be overly competitive by constantly comparing themselves to others. They always want to prove themselves better than others in terms of intelligence, status, education or business.
Unfortunately, this only creates insecurity, jealousy, and resentment. More importantly, when your spirit is possessed by jealousy, physical fatigue and mental insecurity are inevitable.
Always “impatient” waiting for happiness in the future
Unhappy people are always worried about the next chapter in life. They are always driven and curious about what they will have in the future. But happiness is a journey, not a destination.
These people are always wondering what their future has, what they can achieve, and then they are afraid of the risks that will come and force them to achieve their wishes, but the surrounding reality is ignored. In the end, there is only suffering and dissatisfaction with life because we never know the future.